RojoReality TV - Plan to Halt
It started with ‘The Osborne’s’ and now people we face something that has spiralled out of control to a point that we face a nine headed beast, each beast sprouting heads of it’s own, and yes all have tongues. Vicious, know nothing tongues.
The advent of ‘neo’ reality TV (or better know ‘celebrity reality’ now if that isn’t a oxymoron I don’t know what is?) was a dark day in TV history. And now not that many years later I find myself saturated with a myriad of amazingly shit programs full of people that don’t make me want to watch on because they aren’t interesting, and what they do isn’t interesting, and they are 90% of the time incredibly stupid individuals that watching them make me scream to myself “what is going on in the world that these abrasive wankers are getting their own TV shows”.
But, sadly I already know the answer. It is because people are watching these programmes.
Which saddens me even more.
MTV Cribs ran an episode on The Osborne’s. This episode turned out to be one of the highest rated episodes so highly rated that MTV re-ran it to just as much success. Sharon Osborne being the shrewd shrew she is got an idea and ‘The Osborne’s’ was born.
Now I must admit I did watch a few episode of The Osborne’s but it was due largely to my incredulousness to Ozzy’s lucidity.
As with the TV world once a formula is successful this formula is then duplicated over and over till we drown in TV shows using the recipe. A celebrity reality TV chowder made from rancid calamari and Salmon that when it was alive suffered from salmon aids.
I lament, where is the end to the neo reality. We have Girls of the Playboy Mansion (I hate this show so, so, so much) Tori and Dean (redeemed Tori Spelling to me SEE I as bad as you), Keeping up with Kardashiens (I mean who the hell are these brunette slappers), Bret Michaels (at least this has an element of sport to it). Hogan knows best, and now I see that Denise (I was the bond girl in which Bond? Married Charlie Sheen and then did?
There are more, many more. There are more people making them so what can be done?
“Ban all TV? In this reporters opinion. Yes.”
But then I wouldn’t be able to watch Law and Order, well there had to be a down side. So the banning of TV doesn’t work so maybe I might make a few suggestions to the new line up of celebrealiTV.
A show with Neil Patrick Harris.
A show about Christ Benoit (We could call it hanging with Christ Benoit) owwh was it too soon for that? No.
Celebrity Russian Roulette. First up the girls of the playboy mansion I in a three way.
Climbing for dollars.
Who wants to be America’s next Canadian.
A show about me.
Jerry Seinfeld “APARTMENT 5A”
Celebrity funereal.
Worlds most shocking bus drivers.
My Grandma can kick you’re Grandma’s arse
So you think you can fly?
The biggest Gainer (Like the biggest loser but with anorexics)
These are but a few top line reality shows that are just sitting waiting to be made (I’m sure the names are self explanatory). Surely if Denise can get a show whoever is making these travesties can find the time to make my suggestions.
My father a few weeks back sent me a email telling me to stop the petrol rises was to boycott one provider. Apparently this has a flow on effect I stopped reading so I can’t tell you why because I don’t have a car.
I do feel that the small part of the appeal I did read has merit in this case. This could be the way to find a antidote to this plague. We stop watching the E channel to begin with. (Bad channel giving that letter a bad name).
This is one way we can start the stop.
There are many others but hey I can’t do all the work myself.
PS. Ramsey’s Kitchen Nightmares is exempt from my deriding.
